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Silencing your self-critic

Anyone who goes through a difficult period in their lives, whether that is a bereavement, relationship ending, job loss or general stress, will find that their inner self critic starts to make them wonder if they will ever feel OK again. When we are experiencing sadness, heartbreak, self-doubt or worry for a prolonged period of time, we may start to question and be hard on ourselves.

We may ask ourselves why we cannot just snap out of feeling sad, for example. Of course there is a self-protection element to asking ourselves this question so we don't stay there forever but most of the time all that it does is add self-judgement to an already difficult situation.


We beat ourselves up on top of already feeling bad. What would it feel like for you if your self-critic took a holiday for now and you allowed yourself to feel your feelings?


What would it be like to breathe into your feelings rather than running away from yourself? It may feel terrifying to actually stop and be present with yourself but what is the worst that can happen?


Big feelings come and go and unless we actively give them our attention, these feelings just continue to pop up over and over again in our lives. A simple but effective way to start to gently cultivate some self-compassion when you are feeling low is to place your hand over your heart.


Allow yourself to feel the warmth of your hand on your chest as you breathe.


On your exhale focus on releasing all the feelings you have been withholding.



Whenever you find yourself being harsh with yourself or expecting too much of yourself, take a minute to do this simple exercise.


Ultimately the more self-love we can give ourselves, the better we feel and the more we attract people who are capable of loving us as we truly are.

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